“I really should get going,” said Sara, halfheartedly, picking up her bag and car keys. She had a load of chores to get done before the kids came home from school. Then another set of duties before her husband got home, then dinner, sleep, end of another day, and tomorrow, the beginning of another. She was lost in her thoughts when her friend Maria’s voice broke her chain of reverie.
“I wish there was a time I could hear you say “I want….”. Why is it always “I should this and should that”, Sara?”
Maria and Sara had been friends since their college days and had managed to keep up with each other once every few months despite the changing demands of marriage, family, etc. Maria always seemed so dynamic, relaxed and full of life whereas Sara just lived each day as it came along, conforming to the roles society and her family expected of her.
“What do you mean?” Sara asked, startled.
“I mean, can’t you choose to do what you want?” Maria smiled.
“I don’t have time to think of my wants when I have a house to manage and expectations that I have to meet.” Saying this, Sara hugged her dear friend who was so much fun to be with, and drove off back to her daily routine which left her so drained and unfulfilled. But all day long Maria’s words resonated within her. Was it really possible to balance her wants with her family’s needs? Could she be fulfilled within while at the same time cherish and fulfill her varied roles as a daughter, wife, mother, etc? Could she dare to dream while helping her family realize their own dreams? Would it be fair to them? But then, is this fair to her?
So many of us live like Sara, negating ourselves and our passions, thinking this is how we should be, whereas there are many who live like Maria, balancing their “wants” with their “shoulds”. We are more alive, more dynamic, more proactive and more able to give of our best when we live a life we want balanced with the needs of those who are a part of our lives.
We tend to shy away from the things that are most meaningful to us, hiding behind our “shoulds”.
Use these strategies to find your passion and multiply the excitement and meaning in your life:
- Expect the process to be challenging as you search for your true purpose.
- Hidden fears will come to the surface when you first set out to explore your wants.
- Know your values, make a list and define your purpose and passion keeping your core values intact.
- Now, make a list of your favorite activities.
- Look to your past and think of things you loved to do as a child. You will find your hidden purpose in many childhood activities.
- Buy a beautiful diary, use the power of your mind and pen, and write whatever comes to mind. Make journal writing a daily habit.
- Now is the time to act. Start dreaming, then planning and acting on your plans. Make your wants into dreams and dreams into reality by patience, perseverance and practice.
When you believe in yourself, the universe believes in you.